Sitting in the doctors office the other day Julia and I visited with a young woman who was expecting her first child any day. We learned that she was a professor at one of our local Cal States here in CA. She asked my daughter what she wanted to study…she responded musical theater. That was all it took for the floodgates to open and the excitement to exude from this woman. She began to share her story of a dance conservatory that she had attended in NY. It had been the best experience of her life. After graduation she decided to go in a different direction and went on to get her master and PHD in education, she loved learning.

She encouraged my daughter to check out arenas that concentrated on her interest, to deviate from the norm. I myself spent much of my young life as the square peg constantly trying to squeeze into a round hole. The emotional scars of trying to live by the rules of my family and society is still an issue that demands my vigilance to keep at bay.

I work from home and although I recognize and embrace the gift of what I have in my hands my old conditioning of measuring success by your education and JOB title still walks the halls of my mind. In these economic times the masses are looking for ways to claim back their power in the JOB arena. People are tired of being at the mercy of corporate decisions and having futures that are uncertain. Becoming an entrepreneur without the hassles and expense of a store front and employees was the best decision I’ve ever made. As much as I would like to say it was a snap to get started, for me I had to learn a new set of skills. I was used to going through my day doing my chores and errand’s when I pleased. Getting organized and being consistent with my daily actions has taken some real effort on my part. Learning to market online also required me to spend time gathering information in order to get good at it…I have learned to treat this part of my business as continuing education, as things are always changing. But doing what I do gives me a sense of fulfillment and victory. I have the freedom to create what ever income I desire simply by choosing how I spend the hours in my day and I also have the great pleasure of empowering others by assisting them to reclaim their lives and financial futures.

Update

I wrote this some time ago and never published it. I read through this morning and decided that it should be, I think it has a purpose.

Julia starts at the American Musical and Dramatic Academy (AMDA) here in LA a week from today. She is so excited to be with others who share her passion, and to learn from them all.

Emily will be graduating from the University of the Pacific in May of 2011. Many of her friends that graduated this past May, have still not found JOBS. She talks of her uncertain future, and is looking for creative possibilities to use her talents and generate the income she knows she is worthy of…lack and limitation are not part of her vocabulary, and she is confident that doors will open for her, as I know they will for you too.

If you are looking for something to change your life circumstances, take a moment and fill out the form in the sidebar to the right. What I do may not be the right thing for you, but taking the action will put into motion the law of attraction and the universe will conspire to bring you what you are looking for. I’m always willing to assist others who are willing to take action on their own behalf. I wish you every success and happiness…don’t we all deserve it?

This applies to our daily lives as well. By knowing what our core values are we can make effective decisions for our lives. Knowing what kind of person we want to be, whether it’s is in the roll of a leader, friend, spouse, mother, father, co-worker, boss, neighbor, etc., or some combination of, understanding your core values will assist you in making the decisions that will take you to the success you desire.

A Tip To Help!

Successful people are experts at knowing what their core values are and have the discipline it takes to make the decisions to support them. It seems so simple doesn’t it? But for some of us it takes more than just knowing, and understanding, it takes practice and determination to stay on track. Make your list and keep it with you, in your wallet, purse, shoe, bra, anywhere so you can refer to it at a moments notice. It can be a vital tool when you need that extra strength to stay true to your values.

Social Media

I have had the hardest time getting my brain wrapped around the concept of Social Media. I have struggled with many different aspects of it and although I’m happy to report that I get it now, my favorite quote from the movie The Princess Diaries captures the truth, “The concept is grasped but the execution is a little illusive.”
In trying to figure out why such a simple concept has me so stupefied, I have had a couple of revelations that I hope others like myself will fine useful in their pursuits.

Bob Proctor

Now many of you at this point might be saying “whats he got to do with this”…sit tight, I’m getting to it.
I was listening to one of his CD from his Born To Be Rich series the other day, which incidentally I’ve listened to before, but this time I heard something I’d missed the previous times. He was talking about how we are products of our conditioning. That we must be willing to let go of we have learned and been taught before we can learn what we desire.
See, most of us envy attributes in others because we see them possessing something we lack because we’ve been conditioned to think that. But we are all connected to the same thinking stuff that Wallace Wattles talks about in his book The Science Of Getting Rich.
So what Bob is saying is that we can have, create, and possess, the mindset to have, create, and possess what ever attributes, skills, and accomplishments we desire, BUT first we must be will to give up, let go, kick to the curb, what we think we know. Because at that very moment that envy appears, what we think we know is not the truth, it is our conditioning.
Are you still with me?

My Conditioning

I had it drilled into me as a child to MIND MY OWN BUSINESS. The thought of going on the web telling the world what I’ve been up to, seeing what others have been doing and actually throw in my two cents, well… you can imagine the disdain that every fiber of my being had to go against the very core of my conditioning. I have had to replace thoughts like, who cares what these people are doing, who cares what I’m doing, and who’s business it it anyway, with a little more open perspective. I still struggle with the fact that people might find value in the things I have to say, but the things I learn from others is mind blowing. They’ve opened the possibilities of concepts and ideas that never, ever would have enter my mind, and to think all from the comfort of my home, at my very fingertips. WOW!! Who would have thought.
My girls laugh at me because they no nothing of such a conditioning. They use the internet and Social Media like I use to play in the streets with all the other neighborhood kids (a concept they have only heard about).

Avitar

I know that this movie struck a cord with the masses for so many reasons. But the one thing I took away from it was the visualization of plugging my hair into the thinking stuff. I see it intertwining with my personal cord, communicating my desires into it and watching how quickly and naturally it responds to them. When I find my negative conditioning pulling me in the opposite direction of my goals and desires, I stop for just a second and see my hair plugging into source and it taking me where I want to go. I also use it to help me past my discomfort when sharing little tidbits of my life on all the Social Media sites.

Pretty cool…right?

Well, my intention was to really make this more of business tutorial on understanding, and over coming the hurdles of Social Media, but I think maybe went a little off course. Hope it was useful anyway…it would be an honor to have you as friend or follow, see you on the sites!

“When someone becomes a millionaire, the least important thing is what they have. The most important thing is what they have become.”

“Income Rarely Exceeds Personal Development”

-Jim Rohn

The Value of Discipline

I have read many things over the years that talk about Discipline, but none as eloquent as Jim Rohn’s take on the subject. He states “Discipline is the bridge between thought and accomplishment…the glue that binds inspiration to achievement…the magic that turns financial necessity into the creation of an inspired work of art.” Can’t you just hear the melody that would accompany these words if they were a song?
I know for years that discipline had a negative connotations for me. It made me feel powerless, like my freedom to do as I pleased was being held hostage. I can’t help but feel really silly now when I read Jim’s definition…how foolish I’ve been. All those years wasted, rebelling against the very thing I’d been fighting for…power and freedom over my own life.
Discipline is not a dirty word, it is the skill that catapults us into success. If I had a dime for every project that I NEVER finished maybe then I would have had the financial success I was looking for. But unfortunately no one pays for services not rendered.

Goal Setting

Without goals life is left to chance. My daughter has an app on her iphone that gives two choices, you select one of the two and then it gives you two more to choose from such as: would you rather eat hair that taste like chocolate, or moldy food in the refrigerator?
When it comes to goal setting it is much the same, would you rather have a life with the out come of your choosing, or would you rather leave it to chance?

The Tricky Part

Now the tricky part is to figure out what goals support your “rather” choices and combine it with the glue of discipline to create your inspired work of art…are you still with me?
Lets pick a goal, it can be anything. For argument sake lets pick something simple like losing ten pounds. Although I’ve tried for years to find a magic wand that would melt those unwanted pounds away we all know that in the end that losing weight is as simple as calories in – minus calories burned – equals pounds lost. There are infinite ways to get the calories in and a few less ways to burn them. But lets say you want to lose weight and get healthy, your choices would diminish considerably. Next you have to decide if you are willing to do what is required to eat healthy and exercise in order to lose the ten pounds. If you aren’t you need to find a different goal because you will never accomplish it if you are unwilling to do what it takes to achieve it.
It is the same for every desire we have. Achievement = goal +willingness to do what ever it takes to get there. Personal development is the key to all success, it is the action of discipline to learn new skills, gain new knowledge and put it into action that turns us into the person, the people we want to be.

Goals for 2010

As we begin a new decade and a new year I encourage you to make your first goal to play the “rather” game. Set a minimum of 4, 1-3-5-and 10 year goals that will move you forward and closer to a life you are worthy of…Claim Your Wealth in 2010!

Focus for 2010

As 2009 comes to a close, many of us reflect on our lives over the past year. We ask ourselves the same age old question “Where did the time go?” We go over the list of goals that were or weren’t achieved, we pat ourselves on the back and say good job or hang our head in disappointment that we let ourselves down…again!
But with the arrival of January comes new hope for improvement and change. We forgive ourselves and join the masses with New Years Resolutions.

Having a Master Plan

I know I myself do better when I have tools to keep me on track and give my thoughts a positive direction to go in. Recently a friend of mine told me of this ladder of logical thinking. I took one look at it and realized it was exactly what I had been doing over the last three years. The only problem was I was doing it in some jumbled up order. I’d been to Timbuktu and back, God knows how many times, wondering what my problem was, and lets not forget the oh so popular song What’s Wrong With Me? that drones constantly in my head. I let out a big sigh of relief when I learned that what I had been doing was normal, but it sure would have saved me a lot of time and energy had I had a blueprint instead of aimlessly wondering though the mud and the muck.

The Blueprint!

Most ladders are meant to be climbed from the bottom to the top. But in this case it is not important which level you address first, but it is imperative that you understand that changes made on a higher level will ultimately change and impact any level below it, but changes on a lower level will not change or affect higher levels.

Having said that lets start at the bottom.

Environment

Change, or the thought of change starts for most people from pain of our current situation, or environment. We hate our job, our financial situation, our mate, our family, the city we live in, the size and shape of our body, etc.. We blame them for our unhappiness and lack of success.

We must make changes in our environment if we hope to stop the blame and take responsibility for the out come of our lives. Example: It would be almost impossible for an alcoholic to remain sober if he was bartender. We need to remove ourselves from toxic environments if we want to be successful at what ever change we desire to make.

Behaviors

Our behaviors are driven by our experience of our environment. Every time our problem is activated we behave a certain way. We can hear that auto tape go off in our head that says the same old things that keep us stuck.

We must change that tape to play solutions and ideas that will help us to get unstuck and move us forward towards the outcome we desire.

Capabilities and Skills

We need to Identify the capabilities and skills we have that might assist us in making the changes we want. We also need to identify the ones we need to acquire. Make a list and take action everyday towards developing the skills that will help you reach your goals.

Values and Beliefs

I think of values as fundamental policies that define who we are. They govern our lives even though we often are not even aware of them. What you and I believe to be true may differ, it is these differences that cause discord in families, marriages, friendships and in the work place. These differences can also serve a tool to help us look more closely at what we “think” are our values. Values are the things that ignite our passion.

Because values vary greatly among individuals, it makes it is impossible to implement one approach when trying to motivate people. We respond differently to stimulation based on our values.

Beliefs are combined on the level with values because it is impossible to separate the two. But in fact we have beliefs about all the levels. Our beliefs have been apart us from an early age and they gain momentum with every experience we have that confirms they are right. The philosophy behind this is that we actually create those experiences in order to prove that are beliefs are right. We can create any experience we want but unconsciously we choose to create ones that confirm our beliefs.

Idnentity

Identity might be looked at as a personal report card. It is a representation of how well we are implementing our values and beliefs. Do our live, our action accurately depict our true values and beliefs? It is quite possible that it does not.

We choose behaviors all the time that do not support our values – the barometer is called guilt. We feel guilt when we behave in a manner that is not in harmony with our values and beliefs. There is a great example of this in the movie You’ve Got Mail. Meg Ryan wishes she could zing a person when they crossed her values and belief boundary. But when she actually flings that very first zing she feels terrible…why, you might ask did she want to zing in the first place if it was against her core value system. Well the answer is simple, she was just unaware that that particular behavior would be in discord with her values. We try things all the time, some we can justify by telling ourselves little white lies because we want the behavior to be okay. An the more little white lies we tell the farther away from our true identity we get. Sometimes it can become hardly recognizable. In Megs case she knew the moment the words left her mouth that she was not acting in accordance with her true values and beliefs.

Spirituality

The diagram uses the word vision instead of spirituality, but they represent the same thing…the bigger picture, our existence, our purpose, our “why” for being here.

Many personal development leaders use an exercise to write your obituary as a tool for finding your “why” or “purpose”. What would people say about you when you die? What do you want them to say about you when you die?
Write it out and be as honest as you can. It is very telling of the course we are on.

Don’t beat yourself up if what you write is not what you want it to be. All of us have wounds that have caused us to create three different identities – an invented self, a false self and a true self. Change should always be about heading back to our true self…our north star.

2010

One of my gifts for Christmas was Jim Rohn’s book 7 Strategies for WEALTH & HAPPINESS. He says it’s a good idea before setting new objectives is to ask “What are the half-dozen things that will make the most difference in the outcome?” Stay tune in January, I will be writing more on Jim’s book.